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The great Chinese dragon which is the greatest dragon in all the world and which once upon a time was towed across the Pacific by a crew of coolies rowing in an open boat—was the first real live dragon ever actually to reach these shores.
And the great Chinese dragon passing thru the Golden Gate spouting streams of water like a string of fireboats then broke loose somewhere near China Camp gulped down a hundred Chinese seamen and forthwith ate all the shrimp in San Francisco Bay.
And the great Chinese dragon was therefore forever after confined in a Chinatown basement and ever since allowed out only for Chinese New Year’s parades and other Unamerican demonstrations paternally watched-over by those benevolent men in blue who represent our more advanced civilization which has reached such a high state of democracy as to allow even a few barbarians to carry on their quaint native customs in our midst.
And thus the great Chinese dragon which is the greatest dragon in all the world now can only be seen creeping out of an Adler Alley cellar like a worm out of a hole sometime during the second week in February every year when it sorties out of hibernation in its Chinese storeroom pushed from behind by a band of fortythree Chinese electricians and technicians who stuff its peristaltic accordion-body up thru a sidewalk delivery entrance.
And first the swaying snout appears and then the eyes at ground level feeling along the curb and then the head itself casting about and swayingand heaving finally up to the corner of Grant Avenue itself where a huge paper sign proclaims the World’s Largest Chinatown.
And the great Chinese dragon’s jaws wired permanently agape as if by a demented dentist to display the Cadmium teeth as the hungry head heaves out into Grant Avenue right under the sign and raising itself with a great snort of fire suddenly proclaims the official firecracker start of the Chinese New Year.
And the lightbulb eyes lighting up and popping out on coiled wire springs and the body stretching and rocking further and further around the corner and down Grant Avenue like a caterpillar rollercoaster with the eyes sprung out and waving in the air like the blind feelers of some mechanical preying mantis and the eyes blinking on and off with Chinese red pupils and tiny bamboo-blind eyelids going up and down.
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